I bet you all knew something was up when I posted the four Tape videos all in row. Well, now you can see for yourself. What we all thought was long over and buried has come back from the depths of it’s yellowed jelly hell and back into our waking world. Here is Andrew’s latest package with THE TAPE:
The Tape had to die. I realize this, and although included in that object are years of heartbreak, passion, and vengeance, it had to go. Otherwise, we’d just continue the cycle of destruction. So: Included in the package, then, were a few other recordable devices: The first was the wax figure I was cutting into before the postal service got to me. Inside of that was was a whole lot of foil and a memory stick that had been stripped of its casings. I was greatly excited: Now that the tape was dead, we were moving on to sending this stick back and forth to each other (which provided a lot more hiding opportunities, as shown by the wax). But, no. Instead it was a poop video.
This wasn’t it, was it? I had waited around three and a half years for Andrew’s reply, and he gives me a poop movie that lasts a few minutes? I was distraught and angry, but I had some bit of resolution when I came across the piece of cardboard that the cake (which you couldn’t see, but it read “I AM DEAD” in wonderful frosting letters): “NOT YET, SOON” it read. Okay, so pretty soon I was going to get another package from Andrew. Good, so I’ll just eat these cookies and wait.
Well, there was another surprise in ANOTHER cookie (Yes, Andrew Gingerich is a devious sort): More foil, this time including a Mini SD card. I still don’t know what’s on the mini SD card. I’ve tried a Mini SD card reader, a Mini SD adapter, and a Mini SD slot in a tablet. The card never reads.
Finally, beneath the chocolate cake, there was another video tape. But it was Home Alone 3, with the recordable tab of VHS tapes taken out. So I figured I’d gotten a free copy of Home Alone 3, and I would just wait for next package. Days went by. I got tired of waiting. I figured Andrew had to have included the Mini SD adapted in the package somewhere, and I just had to find it. So where wasn’t I looking? At that point I had eaten all of the cookies and the part of the cake I could (The bottom part was covered in inedible ink), so I dug through my trash through the parts of the cake that I threw away: Nothing. Okay. There was one part of the package that just wasn’t adding up: Home Alone 3. But it had to be Home Alone 3, there was no way Andrew could have recorded over it, which meant one thing: ANDREW HAD HIDDEN THE MINI SD ADAPTER INSIDE OF THE TAPE. I took out my screwdriver and got work on opening the VHS casing. Well, one of the screws stuck and I was impatient, so I ended up breaking open the VHS and sifting through it. Nothing. I had just destroyed my copy of Home Alone 3.
It turns out, and this seems like a massive design flaw in the VHS, that if you just put some tape over the tab area of a VHS (even if the tab has been taken out, thus rendering it unrecordable) then you can record onto said VHS. And that’s exactly what Andrew did: He re-dubbed the saga of THE TAPE onto the Home Alone 3 VHS that I had destroyed. Oops.