Last night I saw Best Worst Movie, the documentary by Micheal Stevenson also known as “Joshua Waits” from Troll 2.

I’ve already gone into a lengthy look into whether or not Troll 2 is truly “The Worst Movie Ever”, however there are a few observations I’d like to make after seeing Best Worst Movie:

George Hardy: Also known as Farmer Waits, George now spends his time in his home state of Alabama practicing dentistry.  Of course, he never stopped practicing dentistry.  Even when filming Troll 2 he was practicing dentistry during the week.  But I digress. What really struck about seeing the real George Hardy, is that he really is a dentist.  What I mean by this is, when you’re getting your teeth cleaned your dentist makes small talk with you, generally about whatever field your involved with (for me and many filmmaking friends, they’re talking about what they liked about various movies they’ve seen, or ideas for a script they had, etc.).  However, what is truly fascinating is that they always remain a dentist.  They cannot, no matter how much they want to, escape from their toothy world no matter how neat and nice of people they may be.  And that perfectly describes George Hardy: A Dentist.

Want some... Joshua fffffffffffffffffffff

Claudio Fragasso: The director of such Italian classics as Evil Dead 5, Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3, Zombie 4: After Death, and Troll 2.  Fragasso continues working in the Italian Film industry, with his latest film coming out October 9th of this year titled Le Ultime 56 Ore.  In my previous post comparing Troll 2 and The Room, I conceded that Troll 2 was the worse film because it was the more despicably shot film.  I still feel this way after seeing a bit of Fragasso in life: The man is despicable.  Firstly, he calls his actors dogs.  As if actors cannot present any useful ideas themselves, but rather must blindly follow the director in his whims. Also, during the filming of Troll 2, Fragasso told all of the American actors that he knew English better than them.  He also told Connie Young (Who played Holly Waits) that he knew more about being an American preteen girl than she did, Connie at the time being an American Preteen Girl.  Fragasso also has this type of God complex about Troll 2, he assumes that when people tell him that Troll 2 is great that they actually mean it’s on par with such cinematic classics as Casablanca, Chinatown, or Fargo (This is clearly not the case.  If you think it is the case, I kindly show you the exit door to my website domain).

Grandpa Seth: His real name is Robert Ormsby, and he’s surprisingly depressing.  There’s an extended sequence in Best Worst Movie where Ormsby is talking about his life has been really unfulfilling and bleak, and it is incredibly sad. I’m sorry, Mr. Ormsby.  Please don’t be sad.

What I found very interesting about Best Worst Movie is that everyone involved with Troll 2 (Except the crew, many of whom still cannot speak English.  Most of whom cannot speak English very well) tried everything they could to run away from it.  However, much like the cursed blood of Duncan, they cannot clear the stigma of Troll 2.  And thus, how do they continue as human beings?  This problem is also seen with the cast of Star Trek, Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher, and perhaps even Johnny Depp.  Certain performances or characters become so iconic, that no matter how hard they try to escape, their tombstones will read “Troll 2″ “Luke Skywalker” “Mr. Spock” and “That Wacky Guy from Tim Burton’s Films”.  What seems inevitable, is that everyone must come back to their iconic performances and embrace it as part of who they are.

In closing: Deborah Reed (Credence Leonore Gielgud, or The Goblin Witch, or That Girl You Want To Kill Every Time She Shows Up On Screen) still remains a mystery.  And that is a problem for me.